Monday, May 31, 2010

Back of gravestone


I realized recently that I never posted a picture of the back of Tara's gravestone, like I promised. Below is the picture, complete with the quote from Weird Al. That is 'so Tara'...

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Monument


Kevin and my parents picked out a very fitting stone to mark Tara's final resting place. Notice the book, piano, musical notes, and guitar around the perimeter. In addition, the stone has a full color picture of Tara with her beautiful smile.
There is a nice saying on the back of the stone, but I'll have to go back and get another picture, since it was too sunny this day and none of the pictures turned out.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Prayer

I was given the following prayer from a co-worker, and it seemed approprite so...

I give you this one thought to keep --
I am with you still -- I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
of the quiet birds in circled flight --
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone --
I am with you still--in each new dawn.

from: North American Prayer

Monday, May 14, 2007

CJ Request for help with Tara Biography

I want to again thank everyone for the prayers that you sent to thehigher side for those of us surrounding Tara during her last days. Iam devastated by this loss and as a way to honor Tara I want tocreate a biography to present to Kiera. I would appreciate it if you would send me your memories of Tara. Type them up and send them inand please include the dates as best you can so I can present the information in somewhat chronological order. You may just have a few memories, but I need as much as I can get to make this an extra special book. Over the past 30 years I have many memories of Tara,but they are all so jumbled together that I will need lots of help from YOU. It completely breaks my heart that Kiera will have nomemories of her mother so I am desperate to complete the project for her and as a tribute to Tara. Even if you have just a few memories, please type them up and send them to me. I would also appreciate pictures and please be as detailed as you can. When I'm back inIllinois I'll be looking to interview people for a video of memories as well so keep that in mind. If something comes to you, jot it down. My e-mail is cjwong8 at hotmail dot com. In peace, C.J.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Leanne VandeCreek Eulogy

Leanne and Kevin gave loving, thoughtful and emotional Eulogies at Tara's funeral. Kevin has already posted his speach, so below is Leanne's. Tara was very lucky to have such a loving husband in Kevin, and a great friend in Leanne!

It's still so hard to believe she's gone....

>>>
How do you adequately discuss a life that was short, yet so significant? Or sum up what someone you loved meant to you?
Tara was such an open person--very easy to get to know. It really didn’t take long to learn that this fiery redhead was passionate about many things.
First and foremost, she loved her family and friends. If you ever had the pleasure of spending time with Tara and Kevin together, then you know how very happy they made each other. Their similarities and differences complemented each other well. They went just about everywhere--and did everything--together. The life they had built together was wonderful. And less than one year ago, they brought Kiera into the world, and what a joy she is to all of us.
Few couples are fortunate to live in close proximity to both sets of parents. From early on in Tara and Kevin’s relationship, they spent a lot of time with their respective parents and in-laws. They enjoyed getting together for meals and attending performances at Drury Lane and other venues. They took vacations and traveled to places all around the United States and Europe together. Sandra and Jim even came along on a few business trips. I recall having dinner with Jim and Tara on several occasions at different American Library Association Conferences. They just loved being together! Holidays were always very big family events, and Tara spoke often of these gatherings where she could visit with the whole family, including Eric and Karen and their boys.
After Kiera was born and Tara and Kevin had to go back to work, Jim and Sandra and Jay and Elaine worked out a rotating child care schedule. They took turns coming out to DeKalb to take care of Kiera at the townhouse so she could remain in her home environment. How wonderful for Kiera to grow up knowing both sets of grandparents this well. Kiera is a lucky girl to have so many people who love her and are looking out for her best interests.
In addition to being very close with her family, Tara loved her friends—and she had a lot of them. Tara and CJ became friends when they were 3 years old. Tara’s Mom and CJ’s Mom were at a local pool one day, when CJ became fussy and had to go home. Upon getting home they discovered that Tara had bitten CJ on the back—hence the “fussiness”. Despite this toothy beginning, they became best friends and remained such. Few of us probably even recall the names of friends we had when we were three, let alone keep in contact with them today. Throughout her life, Tara maintained old friendships including with people from high school and old boyfriends, while all the while making new ones. Friends she made were friends she kept.
Other things that Tara was passionate about…
I would wager that a large number of people in this room had either engaged Tara in political discussions, or observed her participating in such a discussion. These conversations were frequently heated and involved some table pounding. And that was when you agreed with her! But you know, she didn’t just talk the talk, she walked the walk. Not a week went by that Tara wasn’t telling me of a petition she signed or a strongly-worded letter she wrote to some policy maker at the state or federal level. She urged everyone to actively participate in the political system. And Heaven help you if you didn’t vote on Election Day!
She cared deeply about the state of the world and its people. She couldn’t tolerate any form of injustice, loss of freedom, or discrimination. She had special empathy for Native Americans and was also very involved in the Presidential Commission on Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity. I recall a time when Tara and I overheard someone at a restaurant make the following statement: “Little girls should wear dresses and sit quietly while playing with their dolls, while little boys should run around and climb trees in their overalls. That’s just the way of the world.” That really got her going. First came the eyeroll. Then came the crescendoed “discussion”. Check, please! Tara and I used to proudly talk about what tomboys we were when we were little girls. We ran around, and climbed trees, and skinned knees, and went fishin’. And it made us stronger women.
Tara was passionate about learning. Intelligence, intellectual curiosity and education were some of Tara’s many strongsuits. I think if she could have found a way to make a living at being a student, that would have been her chosen profession. When she wasn’t the formal student herself, she was the teacher—whether to music students, or students who worked for her in the Digitization Lab. Her interests were wide and varied, and she truly enjoyed sharing what she knew with others.
And obviously she was passionate about libraries as she spent so much of her life in them. One thing she liked in particular about them is that they go such a long way in supporting 1st Amendment rights and provide unimpeded access to information. One of her favorite t-shirts said “My library has something to offend everyone”. And she wore it with pride.
Food: two words: SUSHI and FONDUE (Although never at the same meal).
Tara is one of the most talented people I will ever know. Nowhere was this more apparent than her in passion for music. From the piano, to the guitar, to the banjo, to the alto sax, to the accordion, to the African Kora, to other instruments I can’t name or pronounce-- from all around the world. She researched them, purchased them, and learned to play them all to one degree or another. She not only taught music for many years but participated in the Yorkville Big Band and the Kish Band.
Shoes: the woman loved shoes. She had more pairs than I’ve ever seen, some of which were her favorites and she wore all the time, like her green Doc Martins. And this pension for shoes extended beyond the ones she wore on her feet to those ceramic collectible ones too. “Shoe” is also a nickname Kevin used for Tara.
Tara once told me that something she first noticed about me was that I was such a “smiley” person. I thought it was funny b/c that was on of the first things I had noticed about HER. And I think you’d all agree that Tara had THE LOUDEST and THE BEST laugh that went along with that great smile. Absolutely infectious.
You know, it’s funny... Aimee and I were talking about this last night. Despite all these talents, interests and activities, Tara frequently described herself as “lazy” which of course couldn’t be further from the truth. In between working, and reading, and political activities and all the rest, she ALWAYS made time for the ones she loved.
Some people move in and out of our lives with little or no impact. Others enter our lives—whether for a short time or a long time-- and touch us in such a way that we are never the same again. Judging by the outpouring of support over the past 5 ½ weeks, and the number of people in this room right now, the list of lives Tara has influenced is long. She’s leaving a huge hole in our lives, and we will miss her dearly.
I’d like to close with a quote from John Donne’s Devotions Upon Emergent Occasions, Meditation XVI. I think Tara would be pleased that I’m correctly citing my source, although she may be slightly disappointed by the non-inclusive language. Anyway, it reminds me of Tara’s approach to life and how she felt towards other people:

"No man is an Island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the Continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own were; any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankind; And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; It tolls for thee. "

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

A few words at Tara's funeral

This is Kevin. I just wanted to make the words that I spoke at Tara's funeral available, for those who wanted to see them.

This is not a eulogy, Leanne has already done that better than I ever could. I just want to talk briefly about the effect that Tara has had on my life.
Tara was a woman of boundless enthusiasm, a woman who never held anything back. It used to annoy her that when asked to rate a movie or book on a scale of one to ten, I would never give anything a ten, because I was always saving that slot, holding onto it for something better that might come along. By contrast, not only did Tara assign tens freely, she often would proclaim that a movie, or an author, or a food, was “the best ever”. I always wondered how so many things could occupy the top slot. But Tara was completely sincere – all of these things were wonderful, all were the best.
All of you are familiar with how open Tara was with her feelings, how her face would light up when she was happy, or darken moodily if she was displeased or sad. I used to watch her as we would watch movies or television, and there was never any question as to how she felt about the show, whether bored, or angry, or sad, or amused. Amused was especially easy, as she liked to laugh. But all of her reactions delighted me, whether positive or negative, whether about food or politics, because Tara cared – strongly, about many things, from friends and family, to the fate of the nation, to whether there was the right kind of margarine on the table. If she was being picky, then good for her, because she was alive, and this wasn’t someone who just went through the motions, she lived life intensely, and it made me more alive to know her.
When I first met Tara in the dorms at NIU twelve and a half years ago, I visited her room, which was filled with music, with fiction, with history, and I realized that this was an interesting person, and I hoped that maybe just maybe, she would be interested in me. To my good fortune, she was.
I could tell you all the ways that Tara has been good for me over the years, all of the many ways that she has supported and helped me and delighted me, but really there are two things that she did for me above all others 1st ,she let me make her happy. There were times in my life that I would be down on myself, full of self doubt, – and then I would realize “but you make her happy”. To have this extraordinary woman light up to see me, to see her smile at me, to know that somehow I made her happy just by being who I was – that was more than enough. 2nd, she brought us Kiera, our beautiful little girl, who is sure to grow up into a smart young woman like her mother .
Tara, I love you. You are my ten. Shine on.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Final resting place


This is a picture of the cemetery plot where Tara was laid to rest. The flowers are just a portion of the many beautiful bouquets sent to the Funeral Home.
The metal sign is temporary. A permanent headstone won't be put in place for approximately 2 months, after the ground has settled.
Once again, the Family would like to thank everyone who has sent cards, flowers, and donations to the Kiera Education Fund. The outpouring of support has been overwhelming.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Memorial

Many people have asked if they can still donate to the memorial for Tara. The answer is Yes. Contributions can be made out to the Kiera J. Sommerfield Education Fund. Please mail any checks to Tara/Kevin's home address, or send to myself, my parent's home (Jim & Sandra), or Jay & Elaine Sommerfield's home. I'm not publishing any addresses here because this blog is publicly available. We are looking into getting something setup online to allow for electronic donations, but until then, all we can accept are checks made out to the Kiera J. Sommerfield Education Fund.

Thanks to everyone who attended the Visitation and/or Funeral earlier this week. It helped the family to know how many people Tara had touched, and I'm sure Tara was watching to see all the people that loved her and wanted to pay their respects.

Monday, April 9, 2007

Donations / Memorial

In lieu of flowers a memorial is being established for Tara's daughter, Kiera Jaye Sommerfield's education. Contributions can be made out to the Kiera J. Sommerfield Education Fund in care of the Anderson Funeral Home, Ltd., P.O. Box 605, 2011 South Fourth Street, DeKalb, IL 60115. For further information please call (815) 756-1022.

Visitation and Funeral Information

Visitation will be held on Tuesday, April 10th from 4:00pm to 8:00pm at the Anderson Funeral Home in DeKalb. Funeral Services will be held at 7:00pm on Wednesday, April 11th at St. Paul's Episcopal Church in DeKalb, with the Rev. Mark A. Geisler officiating. Visitation will also be held on Wednesday, April 11th from 6:00pm until the time of service at 7:00pm at the church. Private family burial will be held at the Auxsable Cemetery in rural Minooka, IL.

Anderson Funeral Home
2011 South Fourth Street
P.O. Box 605
DeKalb, Illinois 60115-8679
(815) 756-1022
Richard Anderson, Funeral Director

Sunday, April 8, 2007

Tara and Kiera


Here's a picture from my mom of Tara and Kiera in January of 2007. Tara had just given Kiera her new NIU shirt.


Funeral and Wake Info

We won't have the funeral and wake information until tomorrow (Monday) at the earliest. We will be scheduling the wake at Anderson Funeral Home in DeKalb. Tara will be buried in Aux-Sable Cemetary in Minooka, next to her sister Lara, her grandparents Lyle and Doris Devick, and her great-grandparents Edna and John Whitlock.

Goodbye, We will LOVE you always!


Tara passed away around midnight, early Easter morning. It's so hard for me to believe she's gone. I believe she actually waited for Easter before leaving us. My other thought is that God decided to end her suffering and took her into Heaven on Easter. Either one actually gives me some comfort. Lord, I miss her so much already! I will love you always, Tara!


Earlier tonight Vishnu posted some pictures at http://picasaweb.google.com/lavanya104/Tara/

I liked this one so much, I decided it was fitting to show it here with this goodbye post. Tara loved her work, and her co-workers, so I'm sure she would have liked this picture.


Saturday, April 7, 2007

Fever

I'm currently spending the night at the hospice. My parents and/or Kevin have spent the night every day this week, so I was happy to finally give them a break. Tara is running a 105 fever, and she's had it for much of the day. They've given her tylenol, but it hasn't brought the fever down. The nurses also told me this will likely accelerate her passing, because the body can only survive for so long with a 105 fever. It's a strange fever, since she doesn't feel warm like a normal fever. However, they've checked her temperature multiple times, and it constantly reads 105.

Friday, April 6, 2007

Friday April 6th update

Many people continue to visit Tara at the hospice, including many friends from the Library and NIU, Tara's good friend Chuck's parents + sister, the drummer from the Big Band Tara used to play in, people from her Church, and, of course, her good friends CJ, Karen and Aimee. In addition, many Uncles and Aunts continue to visit. The family continues to maintain a 24x7 vigil to ensure someone is with her till she passes.

Tara is looking very thin and drawn. The doctors/caretakers are amazed she has continued to survive even though life support and vitals have been removed for quite some time. It's very obvious Tara was an extremely strong person, and she continues to show that every day. It's very tough on the family and her friends, seeing how strong she is, but knowing her physical strength can't save her due to the amount of brain damage.

Thursday, April 5, 2007

New pic + update


Thanks to Matt/CJ for sending me this pic of Tara. This is from 1990.
Tara's condition is still relatively the same. Breathing is irregular, but the heart beat is stronger than earlier in the week. Kevin has stayed with Tara 2 nights this week, and lots of people have visited Tara, including Kiera. Thanks to CJ for putting in a 'guest book' for everyone who visits to sign. All the hospice caretackers are very nice, and they have been doing a wonderful job of providing comfort care to Tara. We all continue to wait and try to support Tara.


Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Older posts

Some people have asked me "what happened to the older posts with the pictures, etc.?" Well, those posts get archived. You can still access them just by going to the bottom of this page and clicking on the link for "Older Posts". There you can see all the older posts, including description of accident, etc.

Monday, April 2, 2007

Visits + update

I would recommend that anyone who wants to visit Tara in the hospice do so as quickly as possible. The caretakers at the hospice have told us the signs indicate Tara may not have too much more time with us. Her heart rate is dropping, and she is starting to have irregular breathing. They tell us these are both signs of the physical body starting to shutdown. We know Tara touched numerous lives, and the family supports everyone who wants to visit Tara to say 'goodbye'.

We'd like to thank everyone so much for the thoughts, prayers, and kind words. You'll never know how much your words, letters, emails and comments have helped during these tragic times. It actually eases the pain to know that Tara has positively impacted all of your lives through humor, mentoring, academics, as a friend, as a co-worker, and as a relative. We will miss her so much!

Friday, March 30, 2007

Hospice info

The address of the hospice is:

Pine Acres Care Center
1212 2nd Street
DeKalb, IL

Directions from I-88 are:
- Exit Peace Road
- Peace Road North (right if exiting going West)
- Left at first light (FairView)
- Right on 4th Street
- Left on Barb (immediately after DeKalb High School) -- note that the sign for Barb street is ONLY on the left side of the street. The street going right is something else.
- Right on 2nd Street
- Pine Acres is on the Right about 1.5 blocks

Tara is in room 109.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Hospice update

Some good news. Kevin and the hospital/health insurance group found another hospice in DeKalb, on 2nd street, that can take over the care of Tara. The plan now is to move her there tomorrow (Thursday). This will be great news for the family, making it much easier to be with Tara 24x7 now that she's closer in DeKalb, rather than Rockford. It will also make it much easier for her co-workers and local friends to visit her.